Being happy for most people is one of the hardest and most complicated things to achieve. They make excuses and live their lives in a matter that allows them to complain, be miserable, and bring you down with them. Actually accepting that you have the ability to create your life puts a huge spin on this scenario. It takes the wind right out of these people’s sails. Once you realize this you won’t be able to make excuses that boost your ego or self-image. Because you will accept you made a mistake, own it, and learn from it. Since you have the ability to control what your do, how you react to it, and how you handle a situation, kind of takes away your ability to complain about something. If you did make a mistake you already owned it, so there is no point in complaining about it anymore. And if you let another person dictate your life in a manner that doesn’t work for you, well that’s your fault and you made a mistake.

If you let someone control your life you are telling yourself everyday that what someone else thinks of me is more important than what I think of myself. And that should never be the case. We are all these unique and amazing individuals who have amazing gifts to share with the world. And being miserable is a choice. You can either choose to accept its raining outside and you have no power over the weather. But you do have the power with your response to the situation. If it’s raining just bring an umbrella with your or wear a raincoat. Or maybe even catch up on some Netflix shows or work at home.

When you begin to look for opportunities rather than whats wrong, it changes your reaction to the outside world. When another person is cranky, your schedule gets messed up, your food is wrong, your hair looks horrible, or when the weather is not what you expected, it will have a different effect on your reaction, day, and life.

Recently, I was faced with a common issue that was very irritating. Instead of losing my shit and becoming a pain in the ass. I choose to look for the opportunities and used my time effectively. I had an appointment for a haircut at 9:00am on a Tuesday morning. I got their at about 8:55 and was greeted by the receptionist. He went back and told my barber that I had arrived. I waited patiently in the lobby until my barber was ready. I whipped out my phone and began to do my daily checklist of things. I checked my email, stocks, and schedule for the week. I looked back at the time and it was 9:12. I thought maybe he is running a bit behind today and got a bit flustered at first because I had a meeting not too long after the haircut. I attention quickly went back towards my phone and I started surfing through the daily meme stream to get my mind off of the delay. I looked at about 30 of these things and then I got a work related email that was time sensitive. I focused my attention on the matter at hand and was able to solve the issue. I went to check the time again and it was 9:19. At this point I was actually very content with the delay and continued my work. I was about to do some research for my portfolio and continue to get work done. I was able to get a lot of research and work done while I worked uninterrupted in the lobby. I was finally greeted by my barber who was very apologetic about the situation and told me he completed lost track of time with his previous client. It was now 9:42 and my barber was ready to give me my hair cut.

Now instead of going off of the deep end with the first malicious and angry thought that came to my head I decided to use my time wisely. I could have gotten angry and stormed out and had to reschedule or find another barber to cut my hair that day. I chose to put my happiness and value of time before the situation and made them a priority. With the extra time I spent in the lobby I was able to thoroughly research a couple of financial articles relating to current world events, which positively impacted my trading for the day. I was also able to review the notes for my meeting and even develop two new concepts to present during the meeting.

Think about your life, happiness, and value of time before you complain, act miserable, and make an excuse. You can’t control everything in life, but you can create your response to all those situations. It’s your choice be happy or be crappy. I will always choose happiness, because that is what is most important to me and the people in my life. What will you choose?

If you want to read some books about happiness, try these.

the happiness equation

the book of joy

the subtle art of not giving a f*ck

the how of happiness

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